Being Heard

Being Heard

"Valerie, I hope everyone dies before you go home!"
Valerie's eyebrows shot up.

"Sr. Janine, I don't know if you want everyone in the hospital to die..." she replied.
It was my fourth week at Parkland Hospital.
Everyone knew handling a patient's death is one of the most difficult assignments for a chaplain.
The paperwork was extensive and the emotional atmosphere of the family was unpredictable and intense.

"Well, I don't mean everyone. You know what I mean. I know you were here all day today and you're staying for the evening shift also because no one is available so I shouldn't say that. But I'm a newbie," I explained.
Valerie laughed and shook her head good-naturedly.
She was a seasoned chaplain and took most things lightly.

Five hours later, Valerie playfully cornered me in our pastoral department's office.
"Sr. Janine, did you know two patients died?"
"Yes."
"Did you know it happened within an hour of each other?"
"Yes."
"Did you know that you had no calls on your pager?"
"Yes."
"Sr. Janine, would you not pray again like that?" A huge smile was playing on her tired countenance.
"Valerie, I didn't know this was how it was going to turn out. Are you okay?"
"I'm a little tired... what would you expect? I'm going home. And don't pray like that!"
Valerie's smile was now a huge grin.

Wow, the power of prayer.
Wow, how God knows the limits of our abilities.
Needless to say, two of us knew God was listening that day.
A Roman Catholic nun and a Reformed Jew studying to be a rabbi.

Note:
"Valerie" is not her real name.
Photo credit: http://blog.lib.umn.edu/wlas0006/1001/2011/11/the-rhetoric-of-superbabies.html

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Grown-up

Grown-up

"Ma, can you scratch my nose for me?"
Connie slowly rubbed his nose.
Each of Ryan's fingers had small pins coming from it.

Ryan had been in the hospital for over a month.
I was his chaplain the day he came in the emergency room for severe burns.
He never knew I was there.

Like any mom, Connie was overwhelmed with fear.
His only other brother, five years older, kept muttering it was his responsibility to keep Ryan safe.

Burns.
Burns on kids.
Months of recovery.
Every chaplain dreads getting these cases.

A nurse came into check Ryan's dressing.
"Sister, you know when Kimmie here first came in, you know what Ryan said," Connie remarked. Kimmie was about 4feet 10 inches and very petite.

"He said that he wanted his grown-up nurse. He looked at Kimmie and said he wanted his grown-up nurse!" Connie broke into chuckles.
"He thought that you were a make-believe nurse?" I asked Kimmie.
"That's what he said. We didn't understand him at first and then we got it and I had to tell him I was real. I went to nursing school, have my degree, and worked for several years already," Kimmie said with a smile.

"Grown-up nurse! Ryan you are so silly!" Connie continued with a smile.
Underneath her smile, I saw how her features have become marked with sadness and soulful beauty.

I rejoiced that she could laugh.
I rejoiced that she allowed herself joy although she had to see her son, bandaged mummified-like and needled in five different places.
I rejoiced that she continued to take care of her physical appearance although I saw her in the hospital every day, from 7pm to 9pm.

I wonder if she knew that her son's suffering lent her a beauty that has become indelibly marked on her face.

Note: All names have been changed.
Photo credit: http://stianbl.deviantart.com/art/Toxic-Syringes-Colorful-125931103

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Drunk

Drunk

"Sister, is that liquor?"
I paused mid-step.
The table of young people looked at me expectantly.

"No, but I wish it was!"
They burst into laughter and I smiled.
We had just left church and were at Caravelle restaurant to celebrate Junior's Confirmation.

Our sisters from Việt Nam had sent us beautiful white stone statues of Mary.
This would be perfect for Junior, I thought.
Who else would help him to grow spiritually then Mary, Temple of the Holy Spirit?

I wrapped the tall long box in bright red paper and placed a silver bow on top.
No wonder it looked like a liquor bottle.

Confirmation is a sacrament of choice for Roman Catholics.
Parents baptize their babies because they feel the gift of being a child of God is too good to wait to let their baby decide on their own. Does any parent ask their baby's opinion if milk is good for them?

In Confirmation, the young adults choose for themselves if they want to receive a fresh outpouring and strengthening of the Spirit's gifts. These gifts were first given them in the Sacrament of Baptism. Not all adults choose to be confirmed. Not all adults choose to do what is best for them.

At the first outpouring of the Holy Spirit, Mary brought forth Jesus (Luke 1:35).
At the second outpouring of the Holy Spirit, people thought the apostles were drunk (Acts 2:13).
Drunk enough to convert three thousand people to belief in a crucified God (Acts 2:41).
Drunk enough that this church has lasted over two thousand years, withstood corrupt leaders, and has members from over 150 nationalities.

At the second outpouring of the Holy Spirit, Mary was with the apostles (Acts 1:14).
Where ever there is Mary, there is the Spirit.

I hope all of gets this kind of drunk.

Photo of our celebrating crew at Caravelle in Richardson, TX.

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Old Friend from Far Away

Old Friend from Far Away

"Oh Janine, it's for you!"
I opened my eyes in surprise.

Sr. Gwen Huyền was opening presents from her family.
We were gathered around our Christmas tree in the convent living room.
All of us had finished opening our presents. It was mostly cash since our families lived far away.

Sr. Gwen's family lived in town and she still had a good size pile.
"It's from Corinne."

She and her husband had gotten a gift for Sr. Gwen and our community.
And me?

Corinne and I went to school together for ten years.
We had our share of fights and talks.

I became a nun.
She got married.
Friendships usually become acquaintances in these cases.

"Old Friend from Far Away" by Natalie Goldberg
The Practice of Writing Memoir
An oil print of a person standing still in a serene winterscape is on the cover.

Janine, I found this at a small bookstore and thought of you.
Hope it gives you new ideas for writing.

Old friend from far away
my words stopped for so long
to do homework, to dry the laundry,
to worry what the new year will bring

It brings
an old friend from far away.
Thank you.

Dedicated to Corinne and Anthony Le
and to Mary, Mother of God and Queen of all Hearts

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Life

Life

"Sơ, what is this?"
He held the little creature gingerly as we paused from our shoveling. It's tongue shot out suddenly.

Quang raised it closer to my face.
We were preparing my little patch of land for springtime vegetables. His parents, aunts and uncles had come to fix our fence. The winds and storms had shaken it loose and eventually broken in many spots. They brought their kids with them. The kids brought their laptops and video games with them. Not Quang and Hồng. The siblings sped around the convent, looking at and touching everything.

That was when they took me up on an offer of helping in the garden.
More exactly, they were shoveling dirt into their shoes.
They were both not more than ten years old.

"Sơ, what is it?" he repeated.
The thin strand-like creature remained erect instead of curling into a limp undulation.
Its tongue shot out again.

"It's a snake," I answered.
"Are you sure?" he asked.
"Yes."

"Aaah!" he screamed as he flung the snake into the far corner of the garden.
I suppressed a smile, noting a lack of his characteristic boisterous confidence.

"Quang, would you have picked it up if you knew it was a snake?" I asked after a few moments of the three of us staring towards where the snake had flown.
"No!" he emphatically replied.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes!"
"You know how close you put that to my face?" I teased gently.
"Yes," he answered ruefully.

For the remainder of our time in the garden, the two clung close to me.
I could sense their lives next to mine.

And I wonder about those lives who don't get a chance to go outside.
Outside their mother's wombs.
Much less outside to feel dirt in their shoes and scare a nun with a snake.

Note: Do you know about the new legislation requiring Catholic employers to provide contraceptives and abortifacients?
https://wwws.whitehouse.gov/petitions/!/petition/rescind-hhs-dept-mandate-requiring-catholic-employers-provide-contraceptivesabortifacients-their/lBxr7SdP?utm_source=wh.gov&utm_medium=shorturl&utm_campaign=shorturl

Photo: Lani Tee, a good friend of our community, took us to a Christ Child ProLife Luncheon in December.

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